Wednesday, August 10, 2005

A real job…

I went to college. And boy did I go to college! I was in college on and off for 8 years, more on than off.

I have several sheepskins to be proud of, including a Masters of Education specializing in Agency and Community Counseling. It was a long haul, studying, counseling, working, and at the end of the day I usually have cheerios in my hair.

Can I just tell you how many people really get annoyed with this? Many get upset, especially women. I had the opportunity to go to college, get good grades and a career that makes a difference. How dare I stay at home while women are needed in the workplace? How dare I be a “sell out” on my dream of being a career woman?

Simple, my dream changed. It changed the moment my daughter came into this world. As soon as I heard that raspy cry I knew where I needed to be, at home with her. I didn't lose my education and it doesn't go to waste.

Unfortunately my new job didn’t have a training course. I don’t get paid vacations or a 401K. I do get job reviews, they usually come in the form of “Mommy, you make the best Peanut Butter and Jelly EVER!” or “When I grow up I want to be a mommy like you.”. Not bad. I don’t get paid but my benefits include nighttime visits to sick kiddos or doing a few hundred load of laundry. My workplace pep talks consist of my hubby telling me to go take a bubble bath and relax or a smooch and a blessing before he goes to work.

You see, it isn’t about recognition or pay. I could go outside the home to work, (although New York State licensure laws really whomp). But, no matter where I was, if I wasn’t at home with the kids I wouldn’t feel like I was doing what I was meant to do. It is a personal decision but one I am very sensitive to.

The next time you see a stay at home mom who “once used to work” please be kind. Don't lecture us on our lost potential. Don't assume that you had a higher GPA than us. Don't underestimate us. Several years from now, when our children are grown, we could be your boss.

6 comments:

Protestant Mom said...

I am so glad I got to stay home as much as I did - nothing is better. Be so happy for yourself and your children. Be so thankful to a supportive husband. Don't think one whit about what others are thinking - they'll see your joy in the path you have chosen.

Jana said...

There is nothing more important than being with your children when they need you most. No one on their deathbed ever says they wish they had spent less time with their kids. I can't imagine being any where else right now. My degree was just four years of my life. My family is my life. No one should criticize you for being a great mom and wife!

charlene said...

I think you put it best: Dreams Change!
Many people don't understand that, but I do, because like you, my dream changed one day. However, my dream didnt change because of children, it changed because I changed......one day I opened my eyes!

I found your blog through Misty's space. http://spaces.msn.com/members/GodBeWithYou/
I really enjoyed reading some of your stuff.

http://spaces.msn.com/members/charlenehall/

And just so you know...these links are not bad. hehehe. In fact, they are very personal and very precious to me.

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